Citizens Arrest

Insomnia: never ever have a latte with four shots of espresso at 7:30 am. I am still paying for it. On to the news flash of the day. Yesterday I was at our local mall mentally and physically preparing myself to go into Christmas debt. I was so nervous I had to prepare myself with a lunch of sushi. I had my usual, tuna and salmon, seaweed and I took a risk and tried octopus. That is a tough fish. Almost like eating rubber. To put it down, I had to have a healthy dose of wasabi and soy sauce. Let's say this, whatever sinus congestion I may have had, became non existent. Leaving the mall I got to my truck and I saw something that just didn't look right. This dude, let's say mid 20s came sprinting out of the main mall entrance. I looked this at first saying, ok this is a prank, but then I saw that he had a box with him and he was running solo. Initially like I said, I dismissed it but then the dude started sprinting further in a zig zag direction. This is wrong, I mean something was really fishy here and it wasn't my sushi. So I use my powers of blackness (inviso mode)and follow him in my truck. He goes from the main entrance, still with this box, to the barnes and nobles then bolts back to the parking deck. Still in inviso mode, I call 911 on my hands free phone saying I need mall security as think I've found a shoplifter. I'm still following this cat as he finally makes it to his car where the driver is apparently waiting. I don't know what possessed me but I played the role of the aloof mall shopper alerting the police to my location while giving the car description and the license plate number. Then he gets out of his car, mind he's the passenger, doing an Eminem imitation saying can you move your car. I was like yeah hold just a minute man ok. By this time I put the flashers and he comes back to the truck trying to get a bit more belligerent, I mean trying to talk loud. I was like hold on you stay right here. By this time he goes back to the car pissed and the driver comes out, a 50 plus white woman saying she's his mother, what's the problem. Finally the cops show up and vanilla ice goes to the cop saying this guy is blocking us in. I'm like hold up chief, I'm blocking him in because I saw run from the with some merchandise without a bag. I'm not saying he stole anything, that it just didnt look right. I hope I'm wrong but I did see him go from the mall exit running to the best buy, then running to the barnes and nobles. I'm going till you get some back up. I think dude knew was gig was up when he saw the car and four other officers arrive. The head detective showed up and I told him the same thing. By this time Slim Shady was in cuffs. Strangely I was still saying, I hope this is right because I don't want y'all to put an innocent man into custody. The cop was like, we have the merchandise, we've got him. We're going to question him and we're going to see if anyone is missing merchandise. To me you were on it man, good job.
Why did I do that? It was incredibly brave at the same time a questionable decision. So why did I do it? I think the first reason was because of my little boy. Now I would not have done this were he with me. But I guess because I am a dad of a four year old, this to me I guess if I'm going to preach right and wrong, then I have to walk the path of those who do the morally right thing. I ain't perfect. That's why there's a savior if you believe. But right is right and wrong is wrong. So sometimes when you see wrong, I guess in this case, when nobody was looking, it was my test: do you really know right and wrong? What are you going to do when confronted with the challenge? So maybe while no one was watching, especially in matters of my safety, God was watching and pretty blessed me with good sense to stay in my truck, be coherent and control the situation. I think the second reason that motivated me to act was, damn man, this is my mall and it's Christmas. I've been going to this mall since 1978 and I bring my son here now. When you steal from my mall, you steal from me. When you act stupid at my mall running like that, you disrupt the flow of my mall where I take my son. You just ain't going to take my holiday spirit and damned if you going to do that at my spot. Of course when I got home and realized what I had done, I did have to say a quick thank you Jesus for keeping me safe and in the words of the late Jerry Reed for not letting that crazy son of a bitch hit my truck!!! :-)