The Budget of Red Chief

"The Force is Strong With This One."
Today I gave Red Chief something I never had. I introduced him to the concept of money and a budget. I can’t believe I did it but you know what, I actually felt like a responsible parent. Not because I introduced him to the concept of capitalism, but because I showed him money that was his own and he actually had to start learning some sense of financial accountability. It was funny because as I picked him up from daycare, I told his teacher that today, Red Chief was going to get his first allowance, $10.00 from dad. To me, this was a milestone because I actually put that in my own budget. It was important for me also in the sense where, I actively changed the course of my own history. I never had anyone show me, this is your money, this is how much you have to spend, go make good decisions. In my 39 years on the planet, I never had anyone show me the concept of a budget, so for me, this is going to be a learning experience as well. So we went to the ATM, where I explained to him what the letters stood for and withdrew $15.00. From there, I had the teller break the ten dollar bill into ten one dollar bills. Going further, I asked the teller to be so kind as to count the money for Red Chief and put it in his little hand. The symbolic message here was ownership. I think what was also important was that you had three African American males transacting financial matters, thrusting the little one into the concept of money and responsibility. He was like, this is mine? I said yes but you need to count it to make sure you have what you are supposed to have, so he counted 10 one dollar bills which were all his own. After that, I told him he had to put it in his pocket and he was now responsible for the money. It was all his, to do with, as he wished. So as we were walking around the wallmart, he saw some big-gulp mugs of which one he wanted. I asked how much was it? He apparently didn’t know so I told him. These are four dollars each. How much money do you have? He responded back, oh, I have $10.00. Ok, so not only was he getting a lesson in money management, but also a reinforcement on subtraction. Here is where today got more interesting! I shared with him that he was going to have to purchase his own triple chocolate chip cookie and chocolate milk at B&N for our father/son cookie time. So now, the concept of budget hit home because I explained to him that his goal was to make sure that he had some money left over by the weekend. I was so proud of him as he remained focused in the Wal-Mart. We walked all through the toy section and the DVD selection where he saw his favorite cartoons. He held on to his money until we got to Barnes and when he got there, I explained to him that he was in charge. He needed to tell the person behind the counter what he wanted and he had to pay for it. The only thing I needed to correct was of course the politics of diplomacy. Make sure you say please and make sure you say thank you. When the clerk said $3.54, I popped him on the counter, opened up his pocket and asked him to count out four dollars and sure enough, he did! He didn’t understand the concept of change so I had to let him know, you wait for your change. Then it was my turn, I got a little nervous because I was fishing for my money and Red Chief was like, that’s ok Daddy, I have enough money for both of us. OK, I was shocked pleasantly but it also struck a nerve. Never will I allow my son to pay my own way! Thank you Red Chief, but dad can handle his own. He was like, but you don’t have it daddy. Then I had to come back with, boy, who do you think gave you your allowance, as I paid for my cookie. I think that was a real turning point for me. I actually can model good behavior. It was like I saw my toddler grow up a little, instantly. Me and his mom, some days to my surprise, are actually raising a smart, good little boy, despite our crossed transgressions. When I have days like these, when I see him after a long break, well groomed, smiling, happy, it makes me cry tears of joy. Some days they are sad because I feel like he is having to re-live my past. That makes me so self-conscious because I so want him to have a home with a mom and a dad under the same roof. That said, I also realize that it’s equally important that the mom and dad who are under the same roof are not just loving to the child, but equally loving to each other. I digress, when Red Chief and I got back to the penthouse, I already had dinner waiting along with some of his favorites, and of course, his not so favorites. On the plus side, there was chocolate milk, chocolate ice cream, peanut butter and jelly, did I say chocolate milk. Now, not on his hit parade were vegetables. These included mustard greens, mixed vegetables, vegetable juice, in other words, the foods every toddler hates. Red Chief is no exception to the rule. Me I just don’t buy into sneaking vegetables in through other foods. To me, its a deceptive trick which I don’t even like to do with our dog. So dinner was fun, we had beef ribs and mustard greens. Needless to say, Red Chief made a mad dash to his closet to obtain some type of toy as a diversion, enter the Jack in the box. Dad can only take so much, so after dad patiently eats his meal, he asks Red Chief does he need some assistance? Why ask the obvious? No daddy, I’m fine as I see not now a mustard green going in his mouth. It got so comical that he picked up my 500 page anthology on cultural studies and feigned reading it at the dinner table. This was so hilarious. I was tempted to ask him, which theorist do you prefer, Stuart Hall and his concept of re-presentation or Barthes work on semiotics? If he had a tangible response, I probably would have started taking notes. Even if Red Chief is slated to be a genius, he is still a genius in training and I represent the head Jedi Knight in charge. That said, on to the Jedi Mind Tricks and the politics of vegetables otherwise know as cajoling and bribery.
Red Chief, if you eat the veggies, you can have the other half of the cookie. Needless to say this only went so far. In my best James Earl Jones voice, the force is strong with this one… This called for a more sophisticated and philosophical approach. Red Chief do you need help with your mechanics or motivation? The words went over his head like a Concorde. Mechanics appeared to be the problem. So, back to trains, planes and automobiles. He ate his veggies and his beef and the world was a much safer place. And guess what, he had a BM! I was so pleased. (it’s the little things that count). Well after chocolate ice cream for dessert we settled up his finances. With six dollars left, he put it in his bank until tomorrow. If he does good, he’ll have some spending cash for the weekend. If not, well this is where dad becomes the ATM. But I have to say this, today as a dad, I felt pretty damned accomplished. Now if I can nail this job interview tomorrow, I’ll feel even better!!!!